Seminar Classes Available
Once again, staff members will be offering courses for the women and men in the company, regardless of marital status. Class size will be limited to 10 as course material may prove difficult.
COURSE OFFERINGS FOR MALES:
1. You too, can do housework.
2. PMS: Learning to keep your mouth shut.
3. Combating stupidity.
4. How to fill an ice tray.
5. We do not want small electrical appliances for Christmas. Give us $$$ and lace.
6. Understanding the female response to your coming in drunk at 4:00 AM.
7. Wonderful laundry techniques (formerly called "Sorting 1A: Don't wash my silks").
8. Parenting (No, it doesn't end with conception.).
9. Get a life; learn to cook.
10. How not to act like a jerk when you're obviously wrong.
11. Spelling: Even you can get it right.
12. Understanding your financial incompetence.
13. You, the weaker sex.
14. Reasons to give flowers.
15. How to stay awake after sex.
16. You CAN fall asleep without it if you really try.
17. Garbage: Getting it to the curb.
18. The weekend and sports are not synonymous.
19. How to put the toilet seat down.
20. How to go shopping with your mate and not get lost.
21. The remote control: overcoming your dependency.
22. Helpful posture hints for the couch potato.
23. How not to act younger than your children.
24. You, too, can be a designated driver.
25. Honest, you don't look like Mel Gibson, especially when naked.
26. Changing your underwear; it really works.
27. The attainable goal: eliminating %$#@! from your vocabulary.
28. Fluffing the blankets after farting is not necessary.
29. Real men ask for directions.
30. How to park without circling the parking lot more than once.
31. How to place a new roll of toilet paper in the dispenser.
32. Romance after marriage.
33. Accuracy in Aiming 101.
34. Why it is unacceptable to relieve yourself anywhere but in the bathroom.
35. Morning Dilemma - if IT is awake, take a shower.
36. Clint Eastwood and Charles Bronson are not fine actors.
COURSE OFFERINGS FOR FEMALES
1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before.
2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits.
3. Combating the Imelda Marcos Syndrome: You Do Not Need New Shoes Everyday.
4. Parties: Going Without New Outfits.
5. Man Management: Discover How Minor Household Chores Can Wait Until After the Game.
6. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too.
7. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor Is His.
8. Valuation: Just Because It's Not Important to You . .
9. Communication Skills I: Tears The Last Resort, Not the First.
10. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking.
11. Communication Skills III: Getting What You Want, without Nagging.
12. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire.
13. Party Etiquette: Drinking Your Fair Share
14. Telephone Skills: How to Stop Talking and Hang Up
15. Introduction to Parking
16. Advanced Parking: Reversing Into A Space.
17. Overcoming Anal Retentive Behavior: Leaving the Towels on the Floor.
18. Water Retention: Fact or Fat.
19. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter.
20. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not For Human Consumption.
21. Cooking III: How Not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People.
22. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully.
23. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To.
24. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have.
25. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice.
26. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together.
27. Ballet: For Women Only.
28. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both.
29. Appreciating the Humor of the Three Stooges.
30. "Do These Jeans Make My Bum Look Big?" - Why Men Lie.
31. TV Remotes: For Men Only.
32. Emotions: Men Have Them Too